What is "mastering," anyway?
It's something they do to albums that costs money. We're not falling for it. See, our record label is what's referred to in the industry as "totally ghetto." We don't like the idea of dropping thousands of dollars on a release, and then having crates and crates of unsold merchandise cluttering up our bedroom for the next twelve years. So let's keep the overhead low and pass the savings on to you, consumer!

What's that hissing sound I hear sometimes?
It's called "tape hiss" (see "mastering" above). Just pretend it's raining outside and that's the sound of the drips on the window-- it's really pretty much the same thing. And be glad I didn't answer that question with "Must be that big snake crawling up your neck."

But hey, doesnt it, like, bother you that it's, well, not "perfect"?
I don't understand what you mean. It is perfect.